Leopold's Lucid Daydreams Diary

[Integrity]

I am so sorry to hear this, Leopold... my heart breaks for you. I know she was the love of your life.

I wish there was some way to convey my sympathies other that words that sound trite. Please know how much I admire your strength through this, and that you are in my thoughts, my brother.

[GPWA Maria]

Hi Leopold,

I am so sorry for your loss, my heart goes out to you and your family, please take care.

[ocreditor]

I am deeply saddened by the loss that you and your family have encountered. My condolences dear friend.
I offer you my thoughts, prayers and well-wishes during this dark time in your life.

[vardan]

I am sorry to hear this, Leopold. I wish you and your family enough strength to go through the pain of your loss. My sincere condolences!

[CarmelS]

My sincerest condolences my friend leopold. Words are useless at times like this....

[AussieDave]

Sincere condolences Leopold.

[Webzcas]

Sincerest condolences Leopold. Thinking of you at this terrible time.

[celena]

My life has gone deaf and mute.
I lost what is irreplaceable.
She died at home in the bed and not in the hell of a hospital or care home.
Holding my hands, in mutual deep love still after more than two decades together, satisfied, without any pain, over two hours falling into the peacefullness and finality of a slowly rising circulatory failure.
I'm done.

What sadness, Leopold. I present you all my deepest condolences.
All my thoughts for you.

[vtyunby65]

Did you guys happen to see the super blood wolf moon a couple of nights ago?

https://www.nbcdfw.com/weather/stori...504642082.html

Leopold, you are missed my friend.

[Roulette Zeitung]

Thank you very much for all your posts and private messages.
As you know, I deeply appreciate that.
One month is over.
And I have the feeling, it happened yesterday.
The grief over the loss of my wife is not abating.
It is rising every day.
Also the anger over the pain caused by the so called medics.
Grief is coming in waves.
Unstoppable.
From one second to the next.
Only idiots, who embodies a blatant lack of empathy, and in this industry, there are a lot of them, only they cannot understand, that our existence is more than having sex with hookers during conferences, watching website click rates even during Christmas or censoring the free mind of others in any way.
Many of them not even can explain, what true love could be.
This modern throw-away society is performing their lives as an egocentric private clickbait story.
The well-being of others is no option.
Only the own clickbait story, to bake the biggest cake in the neighborhood, to have the most flashing lights on the house during Christmas time, to earn the most money and to tell this stories to everyone, so that they should believe, you are the greatest.
Not everybody is doing that.
But the majority is at least dreaming about to do so.
Now, after my wife is gone, I finally experienced, how unimportant money is for me.
Money for me was always a fine tool to give my wife what was her wish.
I for myself can live with less than $10 a day - the usual money / day you receive from GPWA if you distribute flyers at their conference stands in a Robin Hood costume - Yes, $10 for me is enough with respect to food and drinking and normal things like hygiene articles.
The pets have everything they need.
That I can tell you.
I simply do not need more.
For what, the hell?
The most important person in my whole life is gone, and there is nothing, that can heal this situation.
Even if some say, this is possible.
So Siegmund Freud with his grief theories.
One more example, why the differences between theory and reality are so huge.
His theories sounds so easy, a comfortable way to overcome the loss.
When his own daughter passed away, years later after she was gone, Freud admitted, that he still is under the impression of deep grief, cannot overcome the loss.
Disproving his own theories.

One of the wishes here is exactly, what I am thinking and feeling:

Leopold I'm so so sorry for you loss. Knowing you were with her probably made the transition on to another life easy and peaceful for her. Prayers for you and your family.

"the transition on to another life"

During the first 9 days after she was gone, every evening I switched off the lights and for 5 minutes I lit a candle for her and a sparkler.
On the third day, once and one time only I asked her to give me a signal, if she is still there.
One second later the candle's flame started to flicker, very strong, for a couple of seconds.
No fantasy.
No illusion.
No coincidence.
I never asked her again.
To remain this astonishing moment for the rest of my life in my heart.

Why I am back to write here?
Well, my small base of supporters, they deserve it.
And also the audience, because this in some areas overall superficial nothing, no ideas, no real thing, this must have a counterpart, at least one small place, this diary, if it is still allowed.

Leopold

[universal4]

Glad to see you here Leopold

Rick

[vtyunby65]

It’s nice to see you again at GPWA, Leopold. I was worried you wouldn’t come back.

[LottoOnline]

Hallo Leopold,


ich schätze Sie sehr und bin bedrückt über Ihr Leid. Ich denke, dass alle Anteilnahme nur ein sehr schwacher Trost ist. Ich bin ebenfalls wie sie 1951 geboren und seit 46 Jahren verheiratet und hoffe mir bleibt Ihr Schicksal erspart.

Verzweifeln Sie bitte nicht.

[Moonlight Cat]

Sorry for delay. My condolences Leopold.

[Roulette Zeitung]

Opinions on GPWA threads

Today: Poll section - "10 out of 10"

"The result of the gpwa system has been fabulous. You guys make it easy to collaborate and strengthen relationships. I give this forum a 10 out of 10."

My opinion:

A poll is an invitation for people to express their opinion.
If the answer is already defined in the title, ...

However, there is always a chance to see GPWA from different perspectives and to be fair and balanced. Do not forget that opportunity, even if it is hard.

Sometimes it is like looking through a kaleidoscope.
Yes, the same kaleidoscope, we had fun with when we were children.
At least some of us.

You only have to rotate the kaleidoscope as long as you finally see the pattern, you are searching for. If you like this pattern, don't move and let the state of intoxication take control over your mind. And minutes later also over your shaking and helpless body.

If not already done, latest in this dream-like moment you will apply for the private membership and donating $10 to the CCM Foundation. If asked, you will be more than happy to act for free as leader for the GPWA Aerobic Team at conferences to promote a wonderful new entertainment game: "Star Dreamers" - Jump and hop while Michael is throwing coins in the air in front of you. Catch them like stars in order to bounce your way to victory, surrounded by the clamorous crowd.

Leopold

[celena]

Opinions on GPWA threads

Today: Poll section - "10 out of 10"

"The result of the gpwa system has been fabulous. You guys make it easy to collaborate and strengthen relationships. I give this forum a 10 out of 10."

My opinion:

A poll is an invitation for people to express their opinion.
If the answer is already defined in the title, ...

However, there is always a chance to see GPWA from different perspectives and to be fair and balanced. Do not forget that opportunity, even if it is hard.

Sometimes it is like looking through a kaleidoscope.
Yes, the same kaleidoscope, we had fun with when we were children.
At least some of us.

You only have to rotate the kaleidoscope as long as you finally see the pattern, you are searching for. If you like this pattern, don't move and let the state of intoxication take control over your mind. And minutes later also over your shaking and helpless body.

If not already done, latest in this dream-like moment you will apply for the private membership and donating $10 to the CCM Foundation. If asked, you will be more than happy to act for free as leader for the GPWA Aerobic Team at conferences to promote a wonderful new entertainment game: "Star Dreamers" - Jump and hop while Michael is throwing coins in the air in front of you. Catch them like stars in order to bounce your way to victory, surrounded by the clamorous crowd.

Leopold

Happy to read you Leopold.

[elgoog]

Viel Kraft Leopold!

[Roulette Zeitung]

Opinions on GPWA threads

Today: Industry Buzz section - "iGB Affiliate Awards 2019 announced"

Some of the winners really deserves it. Their problem is, that this price mutates more and more into an Anti-Trophy in the perspective of investigative webmasters. In the past, many people are happy to see their personal favorite winning and shaking the head at the same time about some other winners, with all rights.

The ridiculous "voting" is no voting, because at the end only a group of handpicked decides, who has a chance. Everyone knows that. No detailed results were ever shown to the public. No transparency, no interviews on BBC, CNN or MSNBC with the jurors or the inner core of IGB about the voting process. No one knows, if at least the Queen is amused about the voting system or not.

Well, if it comes to massive riots due to the Brexit, then the Queen will be evacuated. The plans for this are on the table. Like in the Cold War, after the Russians launches their ICBMs.

As if she and her clan of appanage freeloaders are the most important persons of the country.

However, programs on the IGB list, which are not corrupt or do not rent a booth, they must be very good to win this price.

Sitenote: A big flop is the huge banner on the top of the winner page from UPayCard.

UPayCard is so serious and professional, that sources from Germany confirms, support to verify accounts is slower than an injured looter with a bullet in the leg, and UPayCard does quasi not accept any documentations to verify the account as a German.

The same documentations even the government here would accept. So the German market was already done for them when they started.

I think, after Buffalo and Bwin acted so wonderful as poster girls for IGB over so many years on IGB's websites and conferences, and after they gave the order to censor me, after they probably sent out also some low IQ or drunk stalker from England to bully me here, it was clear, that IGB are only a bunch of cowards in my opinion and wannabe-serious.

Their problem is, that I will never forget.

And I have a fabulous patience.

Again: Some of the winners really deserve it.
But is that honor worth the price?
I don't know.
The overall opinion on that price is not very good.
You cannot blame the price.
Blame the fixers.

Greetings from George Pape, Teflon Don's "juror".

Leopold

[GPWA Maria]

Welcome back Leopold!!

[ocreditor]

...

The ridiculous "voting" is no voting, because at the end only a group of handpicked decides, who has a chance. Everyone knows that. No detailed results were ever shown to the public. No transparency, no interviews on BBC, CNN or MSNBC with the jurors or the inner core of IGB about the voting process. No one knows, if at least the Queen is amused about the voting system or not.
...

Agreed..there has to be more transparancy here