Is your spouse supportive?

[ck8795]

I am having difficulties in this area with my spouse not being into the whole online thing. In fact he now says he hates online poker. I try to work after everyone is gone to bed, which is why most nights I am on till the wee hours of the morning. Does anyone else have this and how do you keep them happy so to speak and do what needs to get done?

[Webzcas]

In a nutshell yes, very supportive. It was always the plan when I left my paid employment to work fulltime on my sites, that K would also leave her job and work alongside me once my sites started making enough revenue.

She now handles all the company admin work and we work together quite well. We haven't killed each other yet anyhow

[kwblue]

I find it difficult. My wife would rather me stop working on websites altogether. She is more supportive during 'payday', but that quickly fades

[bb1web]

Hi all (K)

at the risk of offending the female community. a suggestion.

make srure hubby gets laid before you start working

too early in the morn here to be more ......politically correct. but a lot of truth to that coming from a male perspective.

my GF puts up with my staying up all night long ..... sleeping till 2 or 3 in the afternoon but on the other hand ..... i support her. her 4 daughters ..... my son's college effort .... and make it possible for her to spend 12 hrs a day taking care of her grandparents that she'd otherwise be forced to get a job ...and if we weren't together ..... a job that would pay very little and take up much time.

so ya ......she's with me on this. I sometimes think I don't show her enough attention but we been together 5 yrs now and she's probably tired of me enough that once or twice a week of bedtime attention is enough.

btw: our dog sleeps in my spot when I'm online ..... the lucky little bitch ...... (she's female so that's not a bad word)

[Doolally]

Mine is fairly supportive. We have our moments, but on the whole she puts up with my online time well.

The way she looks on it is that it keeps me in the house and out of the pub!

[McLane39]

My gf is very supportive of my online gambling tilted career. Can't say my parents were too thrilled about me being a "poker reporter," but they've sinced changed their minds after reading some of my stuff.

To ensure her support of my poker writing / reporting, I taught her how to play and even signed her up on Full Tilt. She's now a huge poker fan and looks over my shoulder when I'm tracking events like the WSOP and other online poker events. Plus, we get to watch televised poker shows together, something I've caught her doing when I'm not there! Sneaky girl.

Long story short, i think if they are even just a little involved, it helps ease some of the lengthy times spent online. Just my opinion tho.

On a side note, I also taught her how to play golf...works out great when we go on vacation.

Here's a pretty interesting piece on a poker tournament I entered her in...

- mclane39

[Don]

Having to please someone else who does not or cannot relate to your interests is difficult. Staying up way past the time when one should be getting the needed sleep makes it all that much more difficult. I confess I like working late at night, when things are quiet. I'm just not worth much the next day, with only 3 hours of sleep. But, I usually have something to show for it.

I'm fortunate that my wife is interested enough in my wacky pursuits to at least listen when I tell her about it, even though she's not into gambling, really. She does seem interested most of the time in what goes on, in particular when I keep her up to date of some of the threads here, and the news of the industry, since it affects our livelihood. And, of course she likes it especially when my efforts pay off.

I sympathise with you, kause. This work is challenging enough without having the support of a spouse, gf, bf.

[rob3786]

My girlfriend is very supportive she things its a great business. Although at the moment the majority of my income comes from a separate business.

[ck8795]

Thanks, ya he thinks it's a waste of time. Although the last couple of months when I have made money he is quick to see. It drives me nuts though when I try to run off ideas and you can see the lack of intrest.

I figure once I show him in a few months when steady income starts to come than maybe his perspective on it will change. As of right now I try to keep the two as seperate as possible so he won't feel resentment with me online so much.

I also think that once my site is 90% complete it will be easy. I spend roughly 5 hours a day now. Although the actual steady work that goes into it is maybe 2...lack of knowledge makes things go at a slower pace but at least I am learning something each day

[casinoranking]

I'm sorry to say it, but you have to have someone who believes in you. I think behind every successful man or woman there is often a supportive man or woman.

My exgf would tolerate me working any time I wanted, even if we had unexpected company or whatever. In the meantime I would make sure that work did not take over my life and that we went out when we should and took plenty of vacations. But if she wanted to go out, and I explained that I was bidding on something on ebay or whatever it may be, she would understand and go out alone or want to go out later.

If the person has objectuibs to gambling then it's a different issue but if you were doing this before they met you then they should accept it.

[Dominique]

My husband has no interest in it, his computer use is confined to email. But he is supportive, even of my attending all these conferences (although I think that may run thin sometime soon, too many of them lately). He definitely enjoys payday.

[matted]

This is a great topic!

My wife is very supportive. And she was even supportive in the years before I made more than a few nickels. We do have the occassional spat, the mostly stems from the fact my "free time" is spent on the business... So I hit the overworked feeling way more often than she does (plus my daytime job requires more energy).

I work my @$$ off though. We try to split everything 50-50... And what is always forgotten in that equation is the time I spend working from home. So taking care of our son and all the work around the house (cleaning, yard stuff, meal perparation, etc) is pretty evenly divided overall. Just when she goes to bed early or watches movies or whatever - I'm working. We have had some tension when I've tried to switch it to a 40-60 arrangement (which does bother me), but my relationship/family is more important than anything else which can draw my time.

[AussieDave]

Excellent topic kaus!



When Robyn & I started dating this was my full time business, that and running a web dev company. She knew from the get go how it was.

Since moving down the coast & scoring the Fortune Lounge gig I've been the bread winner...Not a lot of work here, it's seasonal, so Robyn is officially a Lady of Leisure.

Back in Melbourne Robyn had a full time job, I think that combined with boredom has brought up some issues for her.

Although I've tried to explain I'm working this hard for us, I believe it is hard for Robyn to really understand why I just can't work the 9 - 5 normal business day. As I keep explaining I can't cram 15 hours of work into 8 hours...Plus I have to be on deck at 11pm because that's their daytime.

Apart from working & doing the cooking I don't have to do anything else. She's happy to take care of the house and the domestic stuff.

I've fortunately scored some more work, a min of two web dev jobs a month, so I've decided to get Robyn involved. I'm shocking at bookwork, tax and all that stuff. Whereas she's a qualified booker keeper.

Maybe with her involvement in that side of things, that will give her some hands on insight into the business.

Bottom line...Robyn is supportive, I really couldn't ask for anyone better in my life, sure we have our little spats...but...on the flip side, the best part is making up



Cheers



Dave

[Vrindavan]

>>I try to work after everyone is gone to bed, which is why most nights I am on till the wee hours of the morning


when you get rest/sleep then ?

[bb1web]

Hi again all,

I also think that most people ..... spouses included ...... do not realize the actual work that goes into making the money.

for my situation ......I work better with a tv on in front of me .. (I have adhd) and have trouble staying focused. I even need the tv to sleep and have more than once woke up when she turned it off to say .. I was listening to that. truth. maybe not watching but seemingly a part of my brain cannot turn off ... I need the extra stimulation.


I work mostly at night by choice (i'm a vampire ... so's my son ...its in our blood. we don't know our names before noon no matter what time we TRY to sleep).

my lady came into my life when I was finally making money at this .... and has no reason to complain as it funds her, the 4 daughters ..... and makes it possible to take care of her grandparents.

but its still a difficult situation. I get up at noon on a good day.. often work till dawn or later on most days.

but I think ..... maybe especially my situation because I do watch tv while working ... that my spouse thinks this all comes easy and i'm a lazy ....no good sob at least some the time.

not the case. but hard to prove since when she's in the room ..... I don't or seldom concentrate on the subject at hand.

I explain it this way ...... if it was really that easy ..... everybody'd be doing it. but there are few that are successful enough to go full time.

that all said: for me its addictive. I feel I'm getting something done working and watching tv but when I try to take time off .....just watch tv ...... I feel like I'm worthless and wasting time.

hang in there K. But as mentioned earlier ..... the quickest way I can think of to make a man feel like a hobby or job isn't worth it .... is to leave him wanting in bed. *again apologize to the females if I sound offensive but this is the truth as I see it. - btw: some of you guys could speak up to back up this theory as I know its true but will hold a lot more water with a little back up.

[mojo]

make srure hubby gets laid before you start working

she's probably tired of me enough that once or twice a week of bedtime attention is enough.

But as mentioned earlier ..... the quickest way I can think of to make a man feel like a hobby or job isn't worth it .... is to leave him wanting in bed

Sorry bb but I don't think this is what kaus had in mind when discussing this great topic.

It is more of a loving support issue. In my case, my future husband is a fellow webmaster. I met him online and he built my first website. I am so happy to have someone to share my passion.

However, whatever works.

[TheGooner]

I suggest that the reason for not being supportive is that your partner is feeling left out. It's the same with all "work discussion" where one partner simply doesn't understand the issues at all.

Find a way for your partner to contribute - be it company administration - creating graphics - or even running a couple of pages / blogs on your sites. This can easily be achieved with todays WYSIWYG software.

As they get into it - then you'll get a common understanding of the issues - and be able to discuss them as peers.My partner is fully supportive - but then she works in the business.

We've split some responsibilites and co-operate in some areas where an extra brain helps. For example ... I send out the invoices and chase the programs for payment - while she pays all our outgoing bills.

She's also great with graphics, while I'm the stats, selling and search engine optimisation sort of person.

Finally - work time can be tough - like Kaus I prefer late night, from 10pm to 2am ... while my partner is an early morning type 7am to midday. But we get from midday to 10pm together - 10 hours a day - which is much more than most couples - I think.

I bet that you'll quickly have a much better discussion about it all ... as an example - my partner just called up the stairs that Poker Brat (Phil Hellmuth) has made another final table - and shes blogging on it.

I could never have imagined that discussion 24 months ago ...

[mojo]

Excellent Gooner! Understanding goes a long way!

[ck8795]

>>
when you get rest/sleep then ?

4 nights a week I am up till 2 am. It's not that hard once you get in your groove so to speak. Than my children wake up at 6 and I am back up for that. One night a week I will end up very over tired and crash early but so far it's holding up, I may get a nap in the odd day but for the most part have adjusted to the lack of sleep.

My husband is currently in school for his ticket as a licensed gas tech. I am fortunate to be able to be home with the kids. I take care of his disabled Uncle.

Thanks for your advice bb no offense taken

[ironman2000]

Only think of the good things and not the bad. Somebody sent me the email of the secret, that only thinking positive thoughts will bring positive things. Go to you tube and watch and listen to the "SECRET OF ATTRACTION".